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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26649061">What Dreams Are Made Of</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Attalander/pseuds/Attalander'>Attalander</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Dancing With the Damned (Tanz der Vampire) [6]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Tanz der Vampire - Steinman/Kunze</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alfred’s Had Enough BS, Anal Sex, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst with a Happy Ending, Drama &amp; Romance, Dream Manipulation, Father-Son Relationship, Herbert Realizes He Screwed Up, Human/Vampire Relationship, Hurt/Comfort, Love Confessions, M/M, Makeup Sex, Psychic Abilities, Vampire Bites</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-09-26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 09:53:36</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>5,400</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26649061</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Attalander/pseuds/Attalander</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>“You did <b>what!?</b>” Alfred yelled in shock. “<b>You</b> made me have that nightmare?”</i>
</p><p>Alfred learns what Herbert did to him that first night in the castle. Herbert realizes the full depth of his illusions and what he’s done to the man he loves. With everything out in the open and their hearts strained to the breaking point, their relationship is changed forever.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Alfred/Herbert von Krolock, Graf von Krolock &amp; Herbert von Krolock</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Dancing With the Damned (Tanz der Vampire) [6]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1889503</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>36</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. If We Shadows Have Offended</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I’ve been planning this story ever since I knew Dancing with the Damned was going to be a series. Let’s face it, Herbert needs this.</p><p>Strap in, we’re boarding the angst train!</p>
    </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Alfred learns the truth about Carpe Noctem. He is not happy.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“You did <em>what!?”</em> Alfred yelled in shock. <em>“You</em> made me have that nightmare?”</p><p>Herbert blinked in obvious confusion. They were sitting in their bedroom discussing <em>A Midsummer Night’s Dream</em> when the vampire dropped that particular stick of dynamite. Over six months together and he’d never mentioned that he shared his father’s powers, let alone that he’d used them on Alfred.</p><p>“I wouldn’t call it a <em>nightmare</em>, darling,” Herbert said, tilting his head. “I thought it was rather pleasant.”</p><p>“You... you thought...” Alfred sputtered. He remembered it in vivid, horrific detail. Surrounded by rotting corpses, whispers and singing, exhorting him to embrace darkness and death. The bite, his own transformation, what he’d done to... “How could that be- I <em>killed Sarah!”</em></p><p>“Alright,” Herbert admitted, wilting slightly. “I may have gotten a <em>bit</em> jealous-“</p><p><em>“Jealous?”</em> Alfred felt anger boiling in his chest. “We’d barely spoken by that point!”</p><p>“Well,” Herbert said “I wanted that to change... and it worked, didn’t it? You fell for me the very next day!”</p><p>Alfred’s temper flared, all the hotter for how rare it was. He’d grown to genuinely love the vampire, feeling like a part he’d never known was missing had fallen into place... but this was positively sickening. Herbert had gotten into Alfred’s <em>head</em>, with the express purpose of manipulating him! How could the other man not see how awful that was?</p><p>It felt like an even greater violation than when Herbert had tied Alfred to the bed and had his wicked way that first time. The brunette had (secretly, guiltily) <em>wanted</em> the vampire, and Herbert had genuinely seemed not to realize Alfred hadn’t been completely willing from the start. It was time to disabuse him of that notion.</p><p>“I <em>didn’t</em> fall for you, you bastard!” Alfred yelled.</p><p>“But...” Herbert blinked in confusion. “You came into my bathroom with love poetry-“</p><p>“By <em>accident,”</em> Alfred said, “and then you grabbed my ass, tried to bite me, threw me on the floor–didn’t the book in your mouth mean <em>anything?”</em></p><p>“Alright, I came on a little strong...” Herbert said, evasively.</p><p>“You <em>attacked</em> me!” Alfred cried. “Twice!”</p><p>“Only twice,” Herbert said. “After that I realized you might want to take things a little slower. I never tried again, right?”</p><p>“No,” Alfred snarled. How was Herbert not getting this? “You just threw me down on your bed, tied me to the headboard and then ravished me while I told you to stop! How is <em>that</em> ‘taking things slowly’?”</p><p>Herbert blinked at Alfred. His eyes were wide with shock and bewilderment.</p><p>“Y-you...” Herbert stammered, “your hands were already... you came into my bedroom... I thought you <em>wanted</em>...”</p><p>“You thought I tied <em>myself</em> up?” Alfred asked. How could even Herbert be this dense? “Koukol did it, then shoved me in a closet so I could be food at the ball! I broke out and ran into your room by pure chance!”</p><p>“You were <em>hard!”</em> Herbert sounded like he was on the verge of tears. “You were–you made love to me! Even when I untied you, you took me so <em>passionately</em>...”</p><p>Alfred could feel the heat of his anger dimming, turning into something cold and hard in his chest. His stomach tightened in a mixture of guilt, shame and resentment. Old emotions he’d thought gone were bubbling up to the surface, all the grievances he’d buried instead of expressing, almost managed to forget.</p><p>“I was <em>confused</em>, Herbert,” Alfred said, shoulders slumping. “I didn’t know what I thought, how I felt... maybe I’d have been willing after getting to know you, but you took that out of my hands. You took my <em>virginity</em> without even asking how I felt about it.”</p><p>“Darling,” Herbert said, looking helpless, “I didn’t know... you have to believe me-“</p><p>“I’m not sure I can,” Alfred said. “You’ve been in my head! How can I trust... <em>anything</em> now?”</p><p>“Because...” Herbert looked down, clenching his hands on his knees. “Because I love you.”</p><p>Alfred felt like he’d just kicked a puppy... no, Herbert wasn’t a puppy, he was a tiger cub. Cute and cuddly and capable of horrible destruction without even realizing it. He hadn’t grown up at all in his centuries of unlife, and it was time to show the vampire a bit of harsh reality, the same as Alfred had been shown when he first came to the castle.</p><p>And how dare the vampire look so sad anyway? The fact Alfred had even stayed, had shared his life and his trust and his bed, was completely insane. And here Herbert was, taking that kindness, that forgiveness for granted? Alfred was used to being walked all over, but at least his brain, his single, solitary advantage in this world, had been Alfred’s alone.</p><p>But it wasn’t Alfred’s. Even if Herbert truly, obviously loved him, the vampire had violated his mind.</p><p>“How many times?” The brunette asked. “How many times did you do it?”</p><p>“Just that once,” Herbert said, voice cracking. “I’m not like father, I can’t... I’m not any good at... I love you!”</p><p>He raised his face again, looking at Alfred with tear-filled eyes. The young man felt something break in him, the rage draining away to be replaced by guilt. No matter how angry he felt, how betrayed, he’d never wanted to make Herbert <em>cry</em>.</p><p>“Herbert-“ he said, holding out a hand, but the vampire was already standing, turning towards the door.</p><p>“I-” Herbert‘s voice shook. “I’ll take the crypt today.”</p><p>Then he was gone.</p><p>Alfred stood alone in their bedroom, staring at the closed door. What had he just done? He had lashed out at Herbert with no regard for anything but his own wounded feelings, and now...</p><p>They’d been in such a good place, safe and peaceful and happy. They’d made one another smile and love and laugh... and now he’d made Herbert <em>cry</em>.</p><p>Should he really blame the vampire for something that had happened so long ago? The logical answer was probably ‘yes’, but Alfred had never been one to hold a grudge. The vampire had done so many bad things to him back then, but he still couldn’t hate him for it.</p><p>Hate... what if Herbert hated him now? What if that bubble had popped, and the vampire realized what Alfred was? Just a plain, boring, foolish young nerd with no talent other than science? Herbert would probably cast him aside, leave him broken and miserable. How could he go back to living alone when he’d known what it was like to love?</p><p>Would he go on living at all?</p><p>A sudden terrible thought came to Alfred and he quickly locked and bolted the door before shoving a chair under the handle. If Herbert stopped loving him, stopped protecting him, the human was lunch. Even if the vampires in the castle had enough to eat, the hunger was eternal. Besides, the count would take it as a personal insult, and Herbert himself might be angry enough to seek revenge. At least the professor was safe enough, down in the village instead of the drafty castle for the sake of his growing arthritis.</p><p>Alfred could go down there too. He could take his things and flee, safe in the sunlight until he made enough distance. He dove for his nearly-empty bag under the bed, then stopped. He couldn’t just leave. If there was even the slightest chance that Herbert would forgive him, Alfred was willing to take it, no matter the cost.</p><p>Still, that didn’t mean he had to be stupid. The young man grabbed the crucifix and stake he’d hidden at the bottom of his bag for emergencies, as well as the professor’s smelling salts. He stared at the little bottle, remembering his previous experience with it. If Herbert had been messing with Alfred’s mind, surely this would’ve cleared it?</p><p>He uncorked the bottle and took another disgusting whiff. His mind didn’t change, nothing did except the growing wave of misery. He’d made a terrible mistake, one he couldn’t undo.</p><p>Alfred put the bottle away but kept the weapons. If they came for him, it wouldn’t be one of the count’s minions... the von Krolocks would handle this personally. If the count barged through that door Alfred would go down fighting, but if it was Herbert...</p><p>If Herbert came to kill him, Alfred didn’t know <em>what</em> he was going to do.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>So here we go, the divergence point from canon is revealed: right after "Die unstillbare Gier" (The Insatiable Greed), when Koukol was setting up for the ball &amp; the hunters were sneaking around. He spotted the pair, and Alfred bought time for the professor to escape but got captured in the process. </p><p>I’m not the type to let characters completely off the hook for terrible behavior. As much as I love Herbert (and have softened him considerably for this fic series), he still did some seriously awful things. Alfred’s a forgiving guy, but I still think he’s totally justified in lashing out here. Funnily enough, Carpe Noctem did the OPPOSITE of what Herbert wanted, freaking Alfred out instead of getting him on board with vampirism. Oops.</p><p>Alfred knows that von Krolock also messed with his mind upon first arriving at the castle, but he puts it in a different category. The count may be friendly to Alfred now, but he’s always been aware of the vampire’s powers and malevolence. The count’s mental manipulation isn’t a betrayal, it’s just a matter of course that he’d do that kind of thing.</p><p>Also, A Midsummer Night’s Dream is my favorite Shakespeare play, bar none. I played Puck in a local production once and it’s the most proud I’ve ever been of a role.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Think But This</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Herbert gets a reality check and throws a pity party. Unfortunately, his one guest can’t offer any real solutions.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Herbert lay in his stone coffin, clutching his knees and trying not to cry. The cold, dark tomb had always been his place of safety, comfort, but now it felt so lonely. He’d gotten used to Alfred’s warmth, his soft hair, his kind eyes... eyes that had looked at him with such rage and disgust as he told Herbert the awful truth. Alfred didn’t love him, and never had.</p><p>The worst part of it all was that it made <em>sense</em>. Every event since they’d met took on a new, terrible meaning, standing in stark relief and mocking Herbert’s previous assumptions. The scenario he’d come up with in his own head was so perfect, so clean and beautiful he’d never bothered to consider it might be false.</p><p>It had started when his father came back from wooing Sarah, telling him about their new visitors. They’d had hunters come to the castle before, but never one so young and cute; Herbert had been curious, intrigued, and asked to be at the door when they arrived. When they’d met, he’d been starstruck. This handsome young man, shivering from fear and cold but with such determined eyes, his soft lashes bedecked with snow and brown hair adorably tousled... Herbert had been enchanted.</p><p>So enchanted he’d ruined everything.</p><p>Entering Alfred’s dreams had been easy, even for so poor a psychic sorcerer as Herbert. He’d never seen the point of getting into mortals’ minds or dealing with them much at all... short-lived, brutish, charmless creatures that only made his father miserable. Being born half-human had been an annoyance and he’d taken the embrace as soon as his father allowed it. But Alfred was different, Alfred whose mind was so open and honest, full of bright nobility that seared Herbert to the core... and he <em>wanted</em>.</p><p>The poor youth was horribly repressed, of course. Herbert knew what was done to men like them in the outside world (one more reason why he never wanted to leave the castle) and what little the vampire could read was a tangle of attraction and confusion and determination, all bundled up in a shining, sweet innocence. He wanted Herbert (from just a glance, which was <em>very</em> promising) plus some village girl (boring), Sarah (taken) and Herbert’s father (as if any mortal didn’t).</p><p>That was all he could get from Alfred’s mind with his limited powers, but Herbert still gave what he thought would be a delicious, tempting dream; a vision of freedom, sensuality, everything the night could offer. That was how his father won Sarah over, why wouldn’t it work for Herbert?</p><p>And it had. Or at least it had seemed to. Alfred had appeared right when Herbert was about to bathe, carrying one of the vampire’s favorite books of love poetry. He’d been so adorably shy, obliquely asking Herbert to the ball, hands trembling with anxiety and desire... and the vampire had been lost. His father, the ball guests, everyone else could just go a little hungrier than they’d expected. This sweet, shy, gentle boy was <em>his</em>.</p><p>Of course, Herbert had very little experience with proper seduction. Ever since his embrace he’d dallied with one or another of his father’s subjects, moving along whenever he got bored. Vampires tended to take what they wanted, and he saw no reason not to go in for the bite at once and sort things out afterwards.</p><p>Of course, that had been a mistake. The poor, sweet dear wasn’t ready for that yet, obviously startled. His self defense, although inconvenient, was hardly surprising. Herbert had behaved badly after that, letting desire get the best of him. Even before today he could admit it, but the feeling of the human’s hard cock against his leg when he held him down had seemed to justify things.</p><p>Was it really Herbert’s fault, then, that he’d jumped to conclusions? He’d gone to his bedroom to prepare for the ball, and there Alfred was. Panting. Disheveled. Red and sweating. Hands bound before him and standing right at the foot of Herbert’s bed. He’d read enough saucy French novels to know where this was going. The sweet, desperate virgin comes to his beloved’s room, wanting to be ravished but too shy to say it in words. After that, Herbert had just assumed that any protests were the result of shyness and that his beloved’s body was the truly honest one.</p><p>Herbert started to sob again, banging his head against the stone lid of his coffin. He’d give his right arm for a chance to go back and do it all over. Was there any way he could’ve fucked things up any worse? He’d violated Alfred’s mind and body and then blithely continued on as though nothing was wrong... at least his father had enough self-awareness to feel guilty every time love led him astray.</p><p>As though the thoughts had summoned him, the blonde heard a knock on the lid of his coffin and a soft “Herbert?”</p><p>“F-father...” The younger vampire said, sniffling.</p><p>”Do you want to talk?” His father asked.</p><p>Herbert bit his lip. He <em>did</em> want to talk about this, and his father had more experience with broken hearts than anyone else. Slowly, the younger vampire slid the lid of the coffin down just enough to let him peek out. His eyes met his father’s; dark and old, wise and kind.</p><p>“Papa...” Herbert said, a name he hadn’t used in decades.</p><p>“Oh <em>Herbert</em>...” the count sighed. He reached down to stroke his son’s hair with long, gentle fingers. “Who hurt you?”</p><p>“Alfred,” the blonde said. He realized how his father was likely to react and added quickly. “I mean, I hurt him first. I hurt him so <em>badly</em>...”</p><p>“Ah.” The count said, continuing to stroke his son’s hair. “That is our curse, I’m afraid. I had hoped it would spare you.”</p><p>“How do you <em>stand</em> it?” Herbert asked. “Time after time... you’re always so sad but you always keep trying.”</p><p>“Because I can’t help it,” his father said. “Love is stronger than any of us... the greatest joy and the most terrible pain. A sweeter addiction even than blood.”</p><p>Herbert nodded. That sounded right, as depressing as it was. He had never been so happy as he’d been after meeting Alfred, nor so miserable as he was now. It was like the younger man could reach right into Herbert’s chest, able to cradle his heart or crush it... but no, the vampire had been the one to do the crushing. The human had probably only stayed in the castle due to fear and the selfless desire to help people.</p><p>And that was just like Alfred, wasn’t it? Kind and noble, fearful yet brave in spite of it. Brave enough to let a monster fuck him. Hellfire, he was brave enough to let Herbert taste his <em>blood</em>.</p><p>“What should I do?” Herbert asked, but his father shook his head.</p><p>“I wish I knew,” the elder von Krolock admitted. “Alas, I’m probably the worst person to give that particular piece of advice.”</p><p>“Things worked out with Sarah,” Herbert said.</p><p>“And I still don’t know why,” the count said. “To be honest, I keep expecting everything to fall apart.”</p><p>Herbert couldn’t say anything to that. The resignation in his father’s voice was so familiar, but now it resonated in Herbert’s chest. For the first time in his life, he truly understood his father’s grief... but he was determined not to make the same mistakes.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>And here I finally delve into Herbert and his view of this whole thing.</p><p>I don’t really spell out Herbert’s backstory because it’s not terribly relevant, but I decided that in this continuity, he is a dhampir. Basically, his father was already a vampire when he was conceived, while his mother was human: an event so rare that even other vampires didn’t believe it could really happen. As such, he grew up in the castle, never really interacted with ordinary humans at all, and sees absolutely no downsides to being a vampire except for boredom. </p><p>He’s learning how to interact with a normal person basically from scratch, hence all the mistakes he makes. He was also embraced shortly after he turned 18 (it was going to be his birthday present but he wanted two parties), so he’s stuck at that stage of mental development. His personality and understanding of the world can change as he learns new things, but he still has the hormones and brain structure of a teenager forever. He may never grow old, but he’ll also never grow up. Honestly, he’s lucky the count didn’t give in to the constant begging and turn him sooner. </p><p>He’s also the sort to instantly jump to conclusions and then ignore all evidence to the contrary until he’s slapped in the face with it... And they are always the most extreme conclusions. Alfred loves them, in spite of barely speaking! No, wait, Alfred hates him, in spite of six months together! Seriously dude, stop and breathe XD</p><p>Also von Krolock is a great dad in most circumstances but he is the WORST to give love advice. “Our family is cursed to be miserable and destroy everyone we love” is hardly what a heartbroken teen wants to hear.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. And All Is Mended</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>For once in his life, Herbert von Krolock tries to do the right thing. It’s surprisingly difficult, for more reasons than expected.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I hope this resolution wraps things up to your satisfaction! The angst train is now pulling up to Fluffy Smut Junction.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Herbert knocked on the door of his own room, soft and tentative. He wanted to put it off, postpone the conversation as long as possible, but that wouldn’t be fair to Alfred. The younger man took so long to answer that Herbert thought he might’ve run away during the day.</p><p>“Hello...?” The human said, voice clearly nervous.</p><p>“It’s me, lo- Alfred,” Herbert said, choking on the endearment. The younger man wouldn’t want to hear it, probably never had.</p><p>“Oh...” Alfred said.</p><p>“May...” Herbert swallowed. “May I come in?”</p><p>It was a stupid request, really. This would probably hurt less if it wasn’t face to face, but he wanted to see Alfred, even if it was one last time.</p><p>“Are you going to kill me?” Alfred asked.</p><p>“No!” Herbert cried, then fought to control his voice. “I won’t... I won’t ever hurt you again. I <em>swear</em>.”</p><p>There was another long pause, then the sound of shifting furniture. Bolts and locks clicked on the other side of the door, until finally it opened to reveal Alfred.</p><p>He looked terrible. The bags under his eyes spoke of a sleepless day, and his rumpled clothes clearly hadn’t been changed. He licked his lips nervously, and one hand clutched something behind his back... likely a crucifix or stake.</p><p>“Hi...” Alfred said, raking his eyes over Herbert, likely noting the similar state of the normally immaculate vampire. “Uh, how are you?”</p><p>Herbert’s chest was about to burst. Still so considerate, so <em>kind</em>, even to someone he feared and hated.</p><p>“I’m... fine,” Herbert said; an obvious lie, but the next words were true. “I... listen. If you... you can go. Leave. I’ll handle father.”</p><p>“What?” Alfred asked. “You want me to-“</p><p>“No! I don’t <em>want</em>-“ Herbert sucked in a breath, looking at the floor. He had to be strong. “It doesn’t matter. I won’t keep you here against your will.”</p><p>“That’s it,” Alfred said, a strange note in his voice. “Just like that... you’re not even going to try to work this out?”</p><p>“What’s the <em>point?”</em> Herbert asked. “You said you don’t... you don’t love...”</p><p>Anguish stopped the vampire’s voice. His hands were shaking, but his mind was resolved. For once, a human lover would escape the von Krolocks alive and well. For once, Herbert could be strong and mature... until Alfred left and he could break down sobbing again.</p><p>“Herbert...” Alfred said softly. There was a faint clatter of wood on wood as the human put his stake down on a table, then took a step forward. “I never- I never meant to-“</p><p>“You never meant to tell me, I know,” Herbert said. “You don’t have to spare my feelings.”</p><p>“Not what I meant,” Alfred said. “I never meant to <em>hurt</em> you.”</p><p>Why did the human have to be so kind? Here Herbert was, fighting against his nature, trying to do the right thing, and Alfred was getting in the way by being <em>nice</em>.</p><p>“It’s <em>fine!”</em> Herbert said, on the verge of tears. “Just... just...”</p><p>“I love you.” The words were soft, simple, with Alfred’s usual honest kindness.</p><p>Herbert stared at Alfred, uncomprehending. All these months he’d never said it, and now, when Herbert knew it was a lie? Was this some horribly misguided attempt to make Herbert feel better? The vampire could no longer hold back the tears welling in his eyes.</p><p>“You <em>don’t!”</em> Herbert nearly wailed. “You don’t... you never did...”</p><p>“I <em>do</em> love you!” Alfred insisted.</p><p>“You don’t <em>need</em> to lie, I’m letting you <em>go!”</em></p><p>“Herbert...” Alfred said, grabbing the vampire’s hand. His brow furrowed like he was thinking. “Does... does the bite work both ways?”</p><p>“What?” Herbert asked, confused. What did that mean, or have anything to do with anything? “I don’t understand-“</p><p>Alfred didn’t reply, just pulled Herbert’s hand up to his mouth and bit down on the vampire’s thumb, hard enough to draw blood. The blonde yelped at the sudden pain, trying to drag his hand away, then stopped.</p><p>He could feel it: faint, soft, the tiniest touch on his mind. Alfred had his eyes screwed shut, either at the unpleasant taste or in concentration, forcing his thoughts at Herbert as hard as he could.</p><p>“You... you want me to...” Herbert asked, shocked. Hadn’t the human been furious about the last psychic intrusion? Yet Alfred nodded, digging his teeth in deeper, and Herbert felt something like an invitation in his thoughts, the human throwing his mind wide open.</p><p>The blonde took it. With the bite and Alfred’s willingness, even as poor a mage as Herbert could read him. The first impression was one of annoyance, frustration, and a distaste for the blood in his mouth. Guilt was next, and sorrow, but however strong these feelings were they were fleeting, temporary. The physical attraction was more permanent, which made sense... nobody could fake that kind of sexual enthusiasm. And under it all...</p><p><em>Love</em>.</p><p>Not some blazing bonfire, bright and obvious. This was the heat of red coals, slow to catch light but able to burn and burn forever. Every other emotion was tinged with it, filled with it, so much Alfred seemed to be nearly overflowing.</p><p>“Darling...” Herbert said. “But you said you didn’t-“</p><p>“I didn’t love you <em>then,”</em> Alfred said, pulling his teeth free and kissing the broken skin. “It took me time. I was so confused for so long... but now I know. I <em>love</em> you Herbert.”</p><p>Herbert couldn’t take it anymore. He let out a sob, pulling his lover into a tight hug. Alfred hugged back, letting the vampire bury his head against his throat and just cry, tears of relief and joy and just plain emotional overload.</p><p>“It’s alright...” Alfred said, patting the back of his lover’s head. “I’m sorry... I’m sorry I didn’t tell you before.”</p><p>“I’m sorry I gave you that dream,” Herbert whispered. “I didn’t... I didn’t know how <em>important</em> you were, love!”</p><p>Alfred pulled Herbert into a kiss, tasting of his own salty tears and sweet blood. The vampire sank into it, drowning in the sensation he’d thought lost to him forever. He wanted, he needed, needed the reminder that this was true, that Alfred was here and real and his.</p><p>“Darling...” he whispered into the kiss. His hands were occupied with clutching his lover’s jacket, so he kicked the door shut behind him with a foot.</p><p>“M-my love,” Alfred replied, blushing an adorable shade of pink. “Sorry, I promise I’ll get used to saying it-“</p><p>Herbert didn’t mind. It was cute watching Alfred try, fighting against his natural shyness and awkwardness in order to express his feelings. In fact, it made him want the human all the more. He pressed his lips to his lover’s, hot and yearning, and Alfred answered in kind.</p><p>The two started moving towards the bed, kissing the whole way. Hands wandered everywhere, retracing familiar paths as though they were brand new. They left a trail of clothes from the door to the bed, discarded in their growing haste to get closer, to become one again. It seemed like an eternity before they reached it, Alfred pressing his lover down onto the mattress.</p><p>“I want...” Alfred pulled away from the kiss and licked his lips. “I want to ride you.”</p><p>The thought made Herbert shudder. Alfred obviously enjoyed bottoming, but he still topped nine times out of ten, and he’d never done anything so active as riding Herbert’s cock. The human always seemed a little ashamed, at least at the start of things, like he was waiting for someone to burst through the door and shout at him. The idea of Alfred riding him was both hot and heartwarming, a sweet gesture and a sexy mental image.</p><p><em>“Please,</em> love,” Herbert gasped. He dug his fingers into Alfred’s hips and ground up against his lover’s ass, hard cock slipping between those cute little cheeks. Alfred flushed and looked down, biting his lip adorably.</p><p>The younger man reached for the oil, hands fumbling as he slicked two fingers and pressed them into himself. He moaned, working himself open, and Herbert realized something; they were in the exact same position as their first time, only with the roles reversed. Six months ago he’d been the one kneeling over Alfred, blithely assuming the brunette was as eager as he was.</p><p>But now they were finally on the same page; both wanting, needing, loving one another. No more secrets, no more mistakes, no more regrets... and Herbert’s hands weren’t tied. He reached over to get some oil of his own and slipped one finger into Alfred’s ass alongside the human’s.</p><p>“Herbert!” The younger man cried. “I-I can do it myself-“</p><p>“But I <em>like</em> touching you,” Herbert said. “I love touching you, sweetheart.”</p><p>The human flushed even pinker but didn’t protest, grinding back against the intrusion in his ass. His cock was hard, so hard that it made Herbert drool. He wished he was flexible enough to suck and fuck his lover at the same time, but he’d just have to accept taking as much of Alfred as he could actually manage.</p><p>“Ready?” Alfred asked, even though he was the one being prepared.</p><p>“Just a moment, love,” Herbert said, scooting back. He arranged himself so he was sitting back against the headboard, then guided Alfred to straddle his lap again. “I want to be able to kiss you.”</p><p>Alfred whimpered a little, carding his dry hand through Herbert’s hair and slicking up his cock with the wet one. He hesitated for one last moment, the head of Herbert’s cock pressing up against his hole.</p><p>“You don’t have to,” Herbert said.</p><p>“I want to,” Alfred whispered, as though afraid to say the words any louder. “I want... I want <em>you.”</em></p><p>Herbert felt like his still, cold heart was going to burst. He pulled Alfred into a kiss, trying to express what he was too overwhelmed to say properly. The human kissed back, wrapping his arms around Herbert’s shoulders for support, then started to lower his hips.</p><p>Alfred cried out against his lover’s lips, and Herbert was right there with him. The hot, slick tightness was just as delightful as ever, enveloping the head, the shaft, the base. By the time they were skin to skin, Alfred was panting heavily.</p><p>“Deep...” he gasped, thighs shaking as he bottomed out. “S-so <em>deep</em>...”</p><p>“Are you alright, darling?” Herbert asked, stroking his lover’s flank. This was indeed a position that let Alfred take him deeper than any they’d yet tried, and gravity was making things even more intense.</p><p>“Yeah...” Alfred said. His asshole clenched delightfully around Herbert, making him groan. “Just... just give me a minute.”</p><p>“Take all the time you need, my love,” the vampire said with another kiss. They stayed that way for a while, holding each other gently, Herbert still buried to the hilt inside his lover.</p><p>Slowly, very slowly, Alfred started to roll his hips, never pulling out of the kiss. The blonde merely rested his hands on the younger man’s waist, content to let his beloved set the pace. The slow, sweet grind was matched by the movement of his lips and tongue, hesitant for all that they’d made love a hundred times.</p><p>No... this was something new. Even if Alfred was the one being penetrated, he was making love to Herbert. It was real and true and mutual, without any mistakes or misunderstandings, and it was better than the vampire had ever imagined. For all his shyness, Alfred was letting everything show... every tiny emotion flickering across his face, holding back none of his sweet sounds or gentle, yearning touches. Herbert had never realized there was something missing from their prior couplings, but now he’d never want to exist without this.</p><p>Then Alfred changed his rhythm. He raised his hips, releasing a glorious cry as Herbert’s cockhead grazed over his prostate, then sank back down again. The young man did it again and again, moaning into his lover’s mouth as he started fucking himself in earnest.</p><p>Herbert slid his hands down to grab Alfred’s ass, helping the human with leverage. He also nudged him forward a little, tilting the younger man’s hips to the most pleasurable angle. The next downstroke made Alfred let out a desperate whine, breaking the kiss and burying his face in Herbert’s shoulder. He panted against his lover’s skin, hot and hard, just like the cock that slid up and down against Herbert’s belly.</p><p>“You feel so <em>good</em>, darling,” the vampire breathed. He wanted to thrust up into Alfred’s body, but the younger man was setting the pace. “So good, so <em>perfect</em> my sweet love...”</p><p>“You...” Alfred gasped into Herbert’s shoulder, “you too... l-love the way you feel...”</p><p>Herbert couldn’t control himself. He snapped his hips up with a strangled cry, thrusting into Alfred hard and deep. The human shouted, squeezing Herbert with his ass and his arms, thighs trembling.</p><p>“Sorry-“</p><p>“Again,” Alfred panted. He braced his hands on the headboard at either side of Herbert’s head, leaning in to kiss him. “P-please, I want you to move.”</p><p><em>“Darling</em>...” Herbert gasped. He settled his feet on the mattress and his hands on Alfred’s hips, then met the brunette’s next downstroke with a thrust of his own. Both men groaned at the feeling, and their bodies came together again and again with a delicious, wet slapping sound.</p><p>“You...” Alfred whimpered. “You’re so handsome. I a-always wanted this, wanted <em>you</em>.”</p><p>The words sent heat curling down Herbert’s spine. The younger man had never been much for sweet talk, but now his lover knew why. That made every shy, stammering word even better, knowing it was real.</p><p>“Please...” Herbert said, “please say it, Alfred... say you love me?”</p><p>“I l-love you,” Alfred choked out. “Love you, love you so <em>much</em>...”</p><p>That was it. Herbert wrapped a hand around Alfred’s cock, jerking the younger man off with desperate, sloppy haste. They raced towards the finish, making love with a wild, fierce passion that made Herbert’s blood burn.</p><p>Then Alfred leaned forward and sank his blunt teeth into the vampire’s neck. It wasn’t enough to draw blood or form a connection, but it was enough to make the blonde scream and arch and come. His lover wasn’t far behind, grinding up into Herbert’s spasming hand and down onto his twitching cock until he was spilling all over the vampire’s chest and belly.</p><p>Alfred collapsed against Herbert’s chest, both men spent and gasping. Their lips slid together, less kissing and more just sharing air, enjoying the closeness, pressing their chests together so it was skin on skin.</p><p>The vampire’s cock slowly softened and he whimpered in protest as it slid out of his lover’s body, robbing them of that point of contact. Alfred seemed to feel the same way, because he wrapped his arms back around Herbert’s neck.</p><p>“Can I ask you to do something?” Alfred asked, softly.</p><p>“Anything,” Herbert breathed.</p><p>“Bite me?” Alfred said. He cupped the back of Herbert’s head and guided it down, so the vampire’s lips were pressed against his shoulder. “Just a little, just here...”</p><p>Herbert’s heart was so full it was going to burst. He’d bitten Alfred a few times since that first incident, but always on the lip or finger and always during sex. This was far more intimate, and dangerous; all Herbert would have to do was turn his head and he could bite into the human’s jugular vein... the trust Alfred was offering made him want to cry with joy.</p><p>Slowly, reverently, Herbert sank his fangs into the muscle of his lover’s shoulder. The human stiffened a little, huffing out a sound of pain as his fingers clenched in Herbert’s hair... then he relaxed. The taste of warm blood in Herbert’s mouth was delicious, but it didn’t drive him into a frenzy of lust this time. It was something softer, more gentle and sweet, a connection for connection’s sake.</p><p>A few moments later Alfred put his own teeth to Herbert’s shoulder, gently pressing them against the skin in a silent question. The vampire nodded, and Alfred bit down. Lacking fangs it took more force to pierce Herbert’s skin but the vampire didn’t care, just relished the feeling of Alfred’s mind touching his. He took the offered feelings, love and relief and trust and joy, cradled them close and returned them in equal measure.</p><p>Alfred was the kindest man Herbert had ever known, the most loving, the most forgiving. The vampire swore that from now on he would never take this wonderful man for granted again. He’d suffered a rude awakening, but as beautiful as the dream had been, nothing could ever compare to the reality.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Here we go! Alfred’s finally declared his love, and the misunderstandings are all cleared up. There’s just one story to go in this series, which should be dropping pretty soon.</p><p>Funnily enough, in the show I don’t think he ever tells Sarah about his feelings to her face, which is how I’m justifying him holding out so long on Herbert (and internalized homophobia making it even more awkward for him). Plus being a shy, awkward bundle of adorable.</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>In these dark and trying times, the amazing support I’ve been getting from all my lovely readers is a big emotional help to me. If you can toss a comment or kudo my way, I’d really appreciate it.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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